The goal of Blonde Boss the community is to create a space where we lift each other up! I'll be honest I have not been as present here as I would like to be the last few weeks — why? Well, because my life has fallen apart just like everyone else's. What right do I have to speak on this subject when really there no pandemic experts here! Then I remembered the mission of Blonde Boss - to unite boss babes to look beyond the hair, provide a non judgemental community where we can flourish and lift each other up!
The answer seemed simple - GRAB SOME OF MY FAVE BOSS BABES, and have them speak to you about how they are kicking ass and taking names during these crazy strange times. I have been working my butt off connecting with other boss babes to collab and find the best strategies to deal with all this madness! It would just be selfish for me not to share!
I am so excited to introduce you all to Adrienne Hofer. She is a ray of sunshine, and projects beams so bright you just may have to put on some sunny's! She is a salon owner, stylist, and Redken Educator that gives selflessly to everyone she meets! She's even agreed to hop in as a surprise guest on my next Zoom Staff Meeting! So here she is — let's show her the Blonde Boss welcome — fill those comments with your thoughts, and share this all over your social media and Pinterest as a thanks for her taking the time to impart her wisdom on us!
IS THIS A JOKE? People are freaking out for no reason… They really shut down? Should we shut down? We seriously should close. This is terrifying. What are we going to do? What is the right thing to do? Are we going to lose everything?
My salon was only open for one day when the province of Manitoba declared a state of emergency and our studio closed its doors. I was forced to make difficult decisions that I knew were going to let down my team. I struggled to re-schedule all upcoming appointments. I had to trudge home feeling an overwhelming loss of direction.
It was then that I realized it was time to reflect on WHAT THE FUCK was even happening. First, there came a sense of defeat. Then I felt anger and finally, I started comparing myself to others scrolling through Instagram while in bed, binge watching Netflix like I never had before. Drinking like this was some sort of holiday and feeling like total 💩.
This is not a holiday. This is HARD. Of course, life is hard, but this is not me. This is an extremely uncertain time for many of us, but I needed to make a decision about how to not let this keep me down. I asked myself, how the hell do I get back on a positive note? What do I do to rise above this cloud of negativity?
I can imagine that a lot of you could relate to my experience. So, what did I do? I went back to what I do whenever I feel defeated, bored or stuck.
My name is Adrienne Hofer. I am a business owner, an educator, a dog-mom, a mentor and a girlfriend. I am also a full time stylist—just like most of you. If, like me, you also find yourself in turmoil and are struggling with the uncertainty of the circumstances of Canada and of the world right now. I wanted to share with you my top 10 life hacks. These have helped me immensely to keep looking forward. I promise they will assist you to pick yourself back up and will be the jumping point to put you back in first place of the race to YOUR best life. Despite whatever the circumstances, I believe that we are alike… we are not quitters. I encourage to read these 10 hacks, and then create your own life 10!
1. HANG OUT WITH YOURSELF
Take the time to be alone with yourself—even if that’s hard for you “social butterflies”. It is important to take the time to meditate. If that scares you, remember we should all do one thing a day that scares us. I bet this has got to be one of the easiest things on that list of scary things one could sign up for. Maybe for you, hanging out with yourself means going to nature and taking a hike. For others it may be enjoying a hot bubble bath with your favourite bath bomb and deep condition treatment. My point is that you need to go where you feel the most comfortable and savour that feeling. Disconnect yourself from the world. I mean that literally—TURN OFF YOUR DAMN PHONE and definitely be sure to turn off your worries. Creating this space for yourself is incredibly important because you can actually process your true thoughts and get right into your feelings. Most likely ideas you would not have been able to imagine in a different space or mindset will start to flow. After this I promise you will have way more clarity about what to do next. Your attitude about the situation will change because you changed your state.
2. MAKE YOUR LIST
Think about all the things you always say: I should, I could, I wish, but I just don’t have the time. Now is the time. Start simply with brainstorming and then write all those things down on paper. Once you start with that first idea that pops into your head, more ideas will start to flow with ease. Do not worry about money at this point and do not stress about responsibilities or obstacles. Just start! Once you have enough ideas, you can start prioritizing them. This way you will have a good idea of what is most important to you. Number them and then re-write your list. What's the next step? Time to actually start. Put down your glass of wine, get your butt out of bed and get going on the easiest thing. Put on your favourite playlist and start jamming, complete your first goal. CONQUER IT and cross it off the damn list. Feel good? GREAT, on to the next. Guess what?! Every time you cross more and more off the next will feel better and better. More ideas will keep flowing. Start a new page and repeat.
Guess what you did? You have eliminated your ability to focus on the “competition”. The truth is no one is you. No other person is living your life. Not everyone is in the EXACT same situation. They may relate to you, but they are not you. That is your super power. That is what makes you special. This is your life. Your list is your list and no one else’s. The competition does not exist. You are only in competition with yourself. Who you were yesterday is who you should be envious of and today is your opportunity to compete with HER.
3. ASK YOUR ANGELS
Have you ever heard of oracle cards? Archangel oracle cards are my absolute favourite when I am feeling lost. They are designed to help you reconnect with your inner self and strengthen your intuition. Archangels are very powerful and wise. They are loving guides who can heal and motivate you in amazing ways. If you are thinking, “No, thanks, I am not into tarot card readings!” Do not confuse the two – they’re not the same thing. The philosophy and means of use between them are completely different. Oracle cards are a deck of cards with images and a word or phrase on them. You think about the question you want an answer to or the situation you want help with while you shuffle the deck and then you pull a single card, or you lay them out in a pattern, depending on what you are looking to do.
The decks come with a book to help you understand the cards you pull. You will interpret the cards differently depending on what’s happening in your life so the meaning that you connect to each card will change with whatever is changing within you. The power of these cards lies in the fact that they are so personal. What one person sees when reading the cards will be completely different from what another person reads. With the oracle cards, the goal is to interpret what they mean to you.
Your conscious mind has been taught a lot of stuff over the years, most of it being designed to make you distrust your own intuition and inner perceptions. Learning to let go of the old programming and starting to trust in yourself again can be the start to building your dreams and manifesting the kind of life that you want for yourself. Trusting your inner self is so important because that’s where your true power is — inside of you.
This is a great way to open yourself up and start to fashion a healthy mindset. I make sure that every morning I write out ten things I am extremely grateful for and pull an oracle card for my day.
4. SET UP MANIFESTING AFFIRMATIONS
The most important thing I have ever learned was how powerful your words are. Positive statements like affirmations will help you overcome self-sabotage and negative thoughts.
When you repeat them often, you will start to believe them. When you start to believe them, something magical will happen. This is the start to making a positive change. Self-affirmations will help to relieve the effects of anxiety. To think negatively is extremely easy. Sometimes we do not even realize we are doing it, but negativity is a toxin. It will do nothing except continue to weigh you down. Be mindful of what you say and think; your words might be driving your bad experiences.
During the day, pay attention to your words. If you truly think about what you are about to say before you say it, you will begin to notice things changing for you. A hot tip to remind yourself of this during the day is by putting your favourite affirmations on sticky notes and dispersing them around your home and work areas. Maybe you place one on your make up bag or stash one on your car dashboard. Here are a few of my favourite current affirmations:
I am a magnet of miracles.
I attract opportunity.
I am living my full potential.
I radiate positive energy.
I am letting go of all that no longer serves me.
By being myself, I bring happiness to others.
I set myself goals because I know I can achieve them.
5. MAKE A VISION BOARD
Visualization is the most powerful mind exercise you can do. A vision board should focus on how you want to feel and not just on the things that you want. Don’t get me wrong, it’s great to include the material stuff, but the more your board focuses on how you want to feel, the more it comes to life. The purpose of a vision board is to bring everything on it to life and to give you a clear picture of what you are working towards.
What you’ll need to start:
1. Any kind of board — maybe a poster board from the dollar store;
2. Scissors, tape, pins or a glue-stick to put your board together;
3. Fun markers, stickers, sparkles or anything you want to deck out your board;
4. Magazines to cut out images and quotes, or printed pictures, anything that you want to look at every day (places, people, anything that inspires you);
5. Time (put yourself in a stress-free environment to put your board together. If you’re a social butterfly invite your friends over and make a party out of it — or right now this would be a great zoom activity!)
Preparing the board is also a great way to measure accountability and to understand what you really want. My salon company was created on a vision board. We give anyone interested in working for our company the assignment of a vision board even before an interview. Weird? Why? Because it truly shows the willingness of the person. It shows me why they are asking for this opportunity in life. I want to understand their values and get to know them. Before I invest in them, I want to make sure they are interested in investing in themselves.
6. GET ORGANIZED
My iPhone calendar and my agenda are my MVPS. Time is everything. The best way to live a balanced life is to make sure you’re making time for it. If you want something to happen, schedule it.
Another great asset is timing yourself while doing a task. I get distracted easily and what tends to happen is I am left with a bunch of unfinished to-dos because of it. The best coaching I ever received was to organize your list by highest priority to lowest and then give yourself appropriate time to do each. For example, I have to do a report, so I set the timer on my phone for thirty minutes and get to work. Now, because I have started the timer, my accountability is set. If I didn’t start the timer and something were to distract me, I may slip into procrastination. It’s important to be your own disciplinarian and set (and stick to) your deadlines. If something is more important than what you are currently working on, you have be prepared to move that task to the next day and start on the next. Understand that it is okay to return to a project in order to accomplish the others on your list. As you grow, responsibilities grow and you will have to master multitasking.
7. SAVE FOR YOURSELF
Money doesn’t create happiness but it can create opportunities. The most respect you can truly give to yourself is investing in yourself. Create a budget and pay close attention to your finances. Do the research and create a “just in case” fund. Why? Because six months of hard work, sacrifice and savings could set you six years ahead in life. The choice is yours.
8. TALK TO YOUR PEOPLE
Think about a family member or friend you look up to. What do you love about them? What do they do or have that makes you admire them? Call them and tell them that. Reach out to them. Be around them, even if that’s only face time right now. It’s true that the more time you spend around people you admire, the more you inherit their traits.
9. COLLABORATE DON’T HATE
Why are you comparing yourself to someone else? What are they doing that makes you feel less than? What do you admire so much about this person? Can you learn from them? Do you really even know them or are you just judging a book by the cover? Don’t make this you
r problem. Drop your ego and reach out to them. Make friends with them and learn from them. Jealousy is the ugliest outfit.
10. REWARD YOURSELF WITH HAPPINESS
Finally, once you are set up with a plan, make damn sure you celebrate. Always think about how it would feel to accomplish something and what you would do to reward yourself. Always put your happiness at top priority. Nothing is worth doing if it does not make you happy at the end of the day. The best life is the one you love living. Make sure you’re making the most of it. Don’t be a robot; be a human. You deserve to be rewarded.
Moral of the story: life is full of setbacks. Find your own custom top ten. Practice your ten on bad days and good days. Steal from mine until you perfect your own. The richest life is one where you feel you have been the best version of yourself. I haven’t had the easiest life. I have experienced a lot of hard lessons and I expect to face more. But this one day I had a terrible day, it felt as if nothing was going right in my life and I wanted to give up. I picked up a balloon I had randomly laying in my room. I thought about all the negative things I had let get me down and I blew all that $H!T in to that balloon. I tied it and I held it for a moment. I thought about all the $H!T I had blown in there and how hard I had been trying to make it work. I took my hands and I squeezed that balloon. I squeezed and squeezed it. I made the decision then and there that there was no more room in my life for any of it. I squeezed it so hard — and then it burst. Just like that I decided to let all of it go.
My learnings come from setbacks, I am making the choice to let the mistakes go and to get up again. Remember it is not a bad life, it is just a bad day. You are the only person who can make the best decisions for you. Now go fill up that balloon — and pop the $hit out of it.
These are uncertain times, but what I do know is we are better together! Take some time and drop your thoughts on what your life hacks are for getting through all of this! Make sure to follow Adrienne on Instagram to continue being showered her light beams! You can find her at @adriennehofer for endless inspiration!
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